Monday, October 12, 2020

Tickles Tabitha's Cancer-Tankerous Mommy: The Mommy in the Book.

 

Twenty-six years I was diagnosed with breast cancer and wrote a version of what's now Tickles Tabitha's Cancer-tankerous Mommy. The book was turned down by mainstream publishers who didn't see a market for it and believed that breast cancer wasn't something young women would be concerned about.  

In October 2001, Rosie O Donnell, whose mother had died of breast cancer,  announced the publication of the book on her national talk show. Tickles Tabitha's Cancer-tankerous Mommy went on to be recommended by health care professionals and cancer support groups across the county. 

However, getting the book into bookstores and overcoming the stigma about cancer continued to be a struggle for years.  

When Nutcracker Publishing introduced the Tickles Tabitha character and
implemented the Crack Open a Book Cancer Education curriculum it was a major milestone.
Today's kids and even their parents are usually surprised to hear that when I first became an author there was no way I would have been allowed to read Tickles Tabitha's Cancer-tankerous Mommy at elementary schools.  Talking about cancer- much less- breast cancer was taboo. 

Cancer was not the only topic that was off-limits.  Mental health issues weren't being discussed either.  My Tickles Tabitha title hit on the depression and rollercoaster of emotions a family battling cancer endures in an era when it was just not talked about.  I've often felt as if I'm either a step ahead or miles behind popular perception when it comes to social norms.

Much has changed since the publication of my book, beginning with its author.  

Several years ago I retired to the mountains of Tennessee,  but October is a month I can't let pass without acknowledging Breast Cancer Awareness.  For me, it's been a journey filled with pink pumpkin events and personal angst usually brought on by public speaking. 


I'm proud to say that Tabitha's Cancer-tankerous Mommy helped pioneer cancer resources for children. Talking to children about cancer is no longer deemed inappropriate, and the word breast can even be said aloud to a grade school audience. 

The stigma, shame, and embarrassment  I once felt about my breast cancer and the book I wrote on the topic,  due to the ignorance of others, is long gone.  


I once had another cancer survivor tell me she just felt sorry for the children in the book because the mommy was so mean. I guess she didn't realize the mommy in the book was based on me... only nicer. We can't all be perfect mothers delusional, but if I've learned anything along the way it's that Tickles Tabitha's Mommy is not as mean as I thought she was. 

Despite all that's changed Tickles Tabitha's Cancer-tankerous Mommy remains as relevant today as it was the day I wrote it. Young moms are still being diagnosed with breast cancer. Families are still dealing with mental health issues pertaining to cancer,  young children are still affected by it, moms still feel guilty about it, 

AND women, especially young women,  still have to be their own advocate when it comes to breast health!

I found my lump when my four-year-old jumped onto my lap and I put a hand up to protect my chest. I was 34 with no family history of breast cancer.  Mammograms were not advised for someone my age and today they're still not. 

If you're too young for a mammogram please do a self-exam.  

October (Halloween/Fright Month)  is Breast Cancer Awareness Month. Whoever decided that must have had a wicked sense of humor. 

Even after 26 years, waiting for the results of my mammogram is still scary.  Relieved to report mine came back clean!