Monday, May 22, 2006

After this season’s final episode of Desperate Housewives it appears as if the Applegate’s house on Wisteria Lane might be vacant-- but not for long. Edie is hammering in a sold sign and Cancer-tankerous Mommy is loading up the moving van.
Cancer-tankerous Mommy will fit in well on Wisteria Lane and like her desperate neighbors she’ll give women all over the country something to feel good about--themselves.
It’ll take at least a season for the gals on Wisteria Lane to decide they like this transplanted Southern Magnolia. A breast cancer survivor and mother of two. A publisher, author, and expert on families coping with cancer. In her spare time she plans fundraisers and walks the dog. Let's face it- if I didn't know her intimately myself- I wouldn't like the sound of her either. I avoid do gooders, women who appear to do it all, have it all and make me feel guilty for not walking the dog.
Speaking of those dog walks Cancer-tankerous Mommy strategically plans them in order to avoid of all the desperate housewives- Susan Mayer.
Because before her best-selling children’s book- Tickles Tabitha’s Cancer-tankerous Mommy- there was another book. A book she sent Susan Mayer to critique and Susan sent it back with a note saying she was calling social services.
Well- not exactly but I’ll never forget my manuscript being returned and being told the Mommy was just too mean for a children’s picture book.
That’s what I love best about Desperate Housewives the people who write it appear to actually have children.
Of course we know it’s not real- real life because all the husbands/boyfriends actually talk and I never see them watching T.V.
Just so they know if they ever decide to move in a Desperate (Cancer-tankerous Mommy) Housewife – who survived breast cancer and is now trying to survive everyday life—I’m available for consultation.